College in a Nutshell. . .

Up until this point, college has been a painfully uphill battle for me. I used to fight myself everyday to stay in school because in the end I knew that you need a degree to be successful in life. I used to hate going to classes, even though I kept my 4.0 GPA and I would use my hatred for college as an excuse to drink myself silly on the weekends.Even though I am graduating early and only spending 3 years in college, so far it had seemed like the longest 3 years of my life. Lately, maybe because the end is drawing near for me or because I am finally settled in here at Coastal, being in college doesn’t seem so bad anymore. These are some tips to help you get through those rough patches when you are thinking about quitting school and joining the circus has become your only other option:

1. Join clubs. I know that everyone and their mother tells you to join clubs when you get to college and clubs might have been dumb in high school but they are definitely the best thing in the world in college. Ever since I joined the club Field Hockey team here, I have had a steady group of great friends that only gets bigger every time I go out. It even gave me the confidence to join a marketing club and become the secretary!
2. Get active.Going to the gym is a great way to meet new happy people. The gym is always packed with new people and it is a great place to make new friends.
3. Talk to people in class.
   I am a really introverted person and I hate talking in class. It took me the entire semester to start talking to people on the last day who I am now still friends with! I never made that mistake again. You never know who people know or where you will see them outside of class so make an effort to talk to the people around you and make friends. I promise they won’t bite.
4. Attend sporting events.
   Show some school pride and meet new people while you are at it! Tailgates, basketball games, baseball games the opportunity to see sporting events is endless and they are usually attended by friendly students who love showing off their school pride.
5. Get a job.
   Yup, you heard me get a J-O-B. This might sound horrible on top of all your homework but on campus jobs are usually pretty easy and flexible with your schedule. Jobs are a great way to meet people and if your job is good, usually so are your co-workers.

War on Cops. . .

I know that the war on cops is a really hot button issue right now but coming from a largely police oriented family seeing this controversy unravel before my very eyes is extremely hard to watch. As a the daughter of a police officer I am proud to say that my father fights day in and day out to enforce the law and keep people safe.

I remember in elementary school when teachers would go around the classroom asking the profession of everyone’s parents, I was always the proudest in saying my father was a police officer in the NYPD. Even after he retired from the NYPD and became an Anne Arundel County police officer in Maryland I was never shy to admit that it was my father’s duty to keep the people of our town safe.

I remember when I was younger hearing all the stories of my dad putting those who broke the law in jail, catching bad guys, and going on car chases. He was my very own living superhero. I did not get to see him much while I was growing up because of his work schedule trying to provide for our family and loving every second of being able to protect people with his job but I knew he was making a difference.

Lately videos keep surfacing of “police brutality” and each video with its polarized set of comments gets harder and harder to watch. Every day my dad goes to work I am scared that he will be the next victim of a “police brutality” viral video just because he is trying to do his job or protect himself. It is impossible to be a police officer right now and feel safe. It is even hard to be family members of police officers without feeling the backlash. Not just anyone can become a police officer, they are special people placed in their position because they have a passion for protecting people and upholding the law. All this “black lives matter” and victimization of criminals needs to stop. If you commit a crime there will be a punishment no matter what color skin you have.

Everyday that my father goes to work I am still proud and I have no problem admitting that my dad is a police officer. As people begin to disrespect and disobey police officers it becomes more and more evident that you cannot sustain an environment in which there is no one to enforce the law. There needs to be repercussions when the law is broken, otherwise people will just assume they can get away with anything. People may hate on the law enforcement but when someone is breaking into your home they are the people you are going to call.

I hope that this war on police officers will end soon, because it puts so many innocent lives at risk. No matter what, I will always be proud to wear my dad’s shield numbers and I will never be afraid to admit that my father is a police officer.

Dates….

Recently I went on a date (granted I haven’t been on a date in a while) but I did not think the dating world had changed that much… Boy was I wrong. I thought we would possibly go to dinner and movie? Nope, I was wrong. I tried to take a nice stroll on the beach… that lasted 5 seconds. We decided to try and see some live music but where did we end up on this first date you ask? On the couch, where I could have been by myself but instead now felt the pressure to entertain.

Dating has really evolved into something quite interesting over the past few years. With all these women’s movements about being seen equal to men, the idea of women “sleeping around” is no longer as much of a taboo as it used to be. College culture is also seen as a great time to “experiment” and hooking up with random people every weekend just seems like a common cultural practice.

What happened to taking a girl out on the first date? What happened to the staple of dinner and a movie or a picnic? Can a date with “netflix and chill” even be considered a date? All these hookup apps and sites like Tinder or Plenty of Fish do not really help the situation either. It seems like taking someone on an actual date without the thought of getting anything in return except good company is too serious for most people now a days.

So here’s a little tip to the guys out there, real dates need to make a comeback asap. Sitting on the couch not talking and watching a movie does not count as a date. Expecting something from a girl because you took her to dinner is also not acceptable.

Here is what should be happening, people should be spending less time focused on how hot the person they are seeing is because they want to brag about their hookup and focus on getting to know people’s personalities. It really isn’t that hard to invest a few minutes into talking with someone to get to know them. If you don’t like their personality but you think they are nice to look at that is probably not a good sign for your date or possible relationship. We need to stop considering “Netflix and chill” as a real date and work on being creative for dates. You could picnic on the beach, go play mini golf, do anything other than just sitting around watching dumb movies and waiting for the other person to make a move. If we keep adding to this hookup culture, it is only going to get worse. I for one will not partake in this and I think I will go back to my wine on the couch until the guys my age decide mature…. I might be there a while.

Halloween in College

It is that time of year again! You get to break the sweaters and ugg boots out from the back of you closet. Pumpkin spice is put into literally any and all possible food items and drinks. The days become a little bit shorter and the mornings are colder. Yup, you guessed it fall is upon your college campus.

Fall is a great time while you are away at school. You get to break out all those super comfy sweatshirts and sweatpants that you can wear for days on end without being judged. You get to order warm drinks again at Starbucks, at the football games there is a chill in the air and as a girl you get to steal as many sweatshirts from your guy friends as possible.

The beginning of Fall also means that Halloween is just around the corner! Now I know what you are thinking, “who cares about Halloween, that’s a children’s holiday”. Halloween might have been lame in high school because, well just everything seems lame in high school but Halloween in college becomes cool again.

Some tips for a good Halloween in college are:

• Actually dress up! Dressing up is fun and this is the one night(although in some colleges it can turn into a 4-day weekend) that you can dress up and pretend to be anything you want without being judged. Make sure your costume is creative though, being a cat or a mouse is so overrated. Group costumes are a great idea as well to get friends involved and spending time making costumes together can create some great memories.
• Do fun Halloween things with friends! Just because you are in college doesn’t mean you can’t still go to Halloween festivals. Go to haunt houses, go on haunted walks or visit local pumpkin patches. Take some time out of your weekend and have a pumpkin carving “get together” with friends. Decorating your house and carving pumpkins will get you in the spirit of the season.
• Be safe! Halloween is fun night to go out with friends but be responsible. Just because it is a holiday doesn’t mean that everyone will be courteous. Be aware of your surroundings and drink responsibly.
• Have fun! This is your night to pretend to be whatever you want so make it count! Dance your butt off and make it a night to remember!

Tips to Surviving Midterms

You are sitting in class, spaced out when the dreaded word “midterm” immediately pulls you out of your daze. What?! When did that happen?! Last time you checked it was only the first week of September! Don’t panic, here’s some tips and advice to survive the midterm week slump and make it through to the second half of the semester:

1.Start studying well before the date of your exam. As a procrastinator myself I can tell you that cramming does not work! Start looking at your class notes and power points about 1 to 2 weeks before the test date so that you have time to space out studying the material and ask the professor about any questions you might have.

2.Study each subject for a little bit everyday or every other day. If you only study one class for an extended period of time you might end up over studying and have a brain fart on the exam or end up slacking in another class. Studying the material bit by bit helps keep you focused on the material and not get too bored from reading the same material over and over again.

3.Pick healthy snacks over sugary snacks. Healthy snacks like apples, carrots and popcorn will have a better effect on your energy levels while studying than sugary ones. Sugary foods like chocolate, potato chips and energy drinks make you feel tired and crash half way through your study session.

4.Don’t be afraid to take a break while studying. Your brain needs breaks every so often like any other muscle in your body. If you overwork your brain you will not be able to study efficiently. Choose to take smart breaks like a 20-minute power nap to recharge or go for a run, but do not watch television or go on the internet as a break. The internet is a black hole that can suck you in for hours on end without you even realizing!

5. Figure out which ways that you study best. Some study techniques include flash cards, creating study guides or reading from the textbook. Finding out which ways are easiest for you to learn and remember the material so that you can study more efficiently.

6.Don’t panic! Do your best with studying! If you put in the time and the effort and your grades will reflect it. Go into your test with only positive thoughts about the amazing grade you are going to get. Negative thoughts will only cause you to mess up and second-guess yourself.

7.Celebrate! You made it through midterms! Only half the semester to go, so take a little break and celebrate the end is in sight!

Having “Those” Parents on Breaks. . .

Growing up I thought my parents were the best. They were always looking out for me and had my best interest in mind. I had an early curfew, I was always on time for things and they always had to know where I was going and who I was with. Only when I got to college did I realize I have helicopter parents. Helicopter parents are defined as “a parent who takes an overprotective or excessive interest in the life of their child or children.” Basically a parent who shelters their child just a little (*cough* A LOT *cough*) too much. Being away at college and living on your own gives you as much freedom as you want. You make your own rules. You can decide to eat cookies for breakfast or maybe have a liquid breakfast (if you catch my drift). There are no curfews when you are living by yourself, you are responsible for making sure you accomplish all the important tasks in life and the rest of your free time is yours to make of what you want.

After having this unbridled freedom for such an extended period of time, going home and living with your parents again can cause some issues. Going home for breaks is usually a great time to catch up with family, have a break from the stress of school and see old high school friends. You get to see you hometown, eat in your favorite hometown restaurants and make some new memories with old friends. Every once and a while, however, this bliss is broken by the fact that you remember when you go home you have to listen to those “house rules” again.

Parents make you eat full healthy meals (not just cookies or fermented grapes). Parents don’t like when you sleep in till 3 p.m. on a Saturday for some reason and when you are awake they want you to spend all of your time with them. Most of all helicopter parents love curfews. Most of your friends won’t have curfews but if you have helicopter parents you will forever be the first kid to leave a party just like in high school. It’s a fact that will not change no matter how old you get, so you may as well just accept it now.

I have been home on enough breaks to know that helicopter parents just want the best for you and they are still looking out for your best interest. It maybe hard to go home with all the “rules” and follow them after having so much freedom but breaks don’t last forever. Getting irritated and fighting over the rules will get you no where, parents will always see you as their little baby. Make your life easy by just listening to what your parents want you to do (they are probably paying for your tuition and food anyway) and you can get back to your rebellious lifestyle of cake for breakfast and cereal for dinner in no time.

7 Tips to Surviving the Week Before Going Home

It is the middle of the semester and you are loving life, you couldn’t imagine ever wanting to go home. . . Then the week before a break hits and you don’t think you have ever felt this homesick in your life!

You lose motivation for classes and homework and the only thing on your mind is counting down the minutes till you get to leave campus to go home. Your mind is filled with home cooked meals, your own bed and getting a mental break from the stresses of living at school. Mostly, you just can’t wait to sleep for a week straight and catch up on all the sleep you missed during the semester. Here are some tips to make sure you stay on track in school and don’t lose your mind the week before you go on break:

1. Get a head start on your homework the week before the week you are supposed to go home

This way when the lack of motivation hits you can spend that time day dreaming about home without your grades suffering. By starting you homework early, you also get more free time the week before you leave to hangout with friends!

2. Try to start any large assignments that will be due when you get back from break

The traveling home can be exhausting and you will want to catch up on some sleep when you get back, not pull all nighters doing last minute assignments. Use time management and work on some assignments before you leave, you will thank yourself in the long run.

3. Stay attentive in class

Think about all the hard work you have put in throughout the semester and tell yourself it is only a few more days until break. Try not to skip classes and use absences just because you have mentally checked-out. Teachers still have important information to teach the week before a break. Go to all your classes and before you know it, it will be break!

4. Don’t pack last minuteAs the queen of procrastination I can tell you that packing 5 minutes before you are supposed to leave is not ideal. Even though I tell myself to start packing earlier than the 5 minutes before I am supposed to leave I never do and I always end up forgetting things. Take some time during the week and concentrate on packing so that you don’t end up forgetting essential items!

5. Make a playlist Long flights or drives can make it seem like getting home is impossible, make yourself a playlist to keep you going through a long flight or drive with all your favorite songs. Playlists can make the trek home seem less exhausting and more like an adventure!

6.  Make sure if you are taking a long drive your car is up-to-date on inspections and oil changesOne of the worst feelings in the world is just wanting to get home and crawl into your own bed, then halfway through the drive your car breaks down. A car break down can cost a lot of money and waste a lot of time. You deserve a stress free break, so make sure to take your car into a shop and get the oil changed the week before a long drive or take it into be serviced if a service it due. It can save you stress, time and money in the long run.

7. Make sure to print out all travel and flight tickets ahead of timePrinting out tickets and flight information in advance can save you from any last minute scrambling and make you miss your flight. It is also a lot easier to print your ticket at home than wait and have to deal with the airport kiosks. While waiting for your flight, make sure to keep loved ones up-dated on any delays or cancellations that may delay your arrival time.

Try to survive the week before a break! If you stay on top of your work and travel plans it will make your break a lot less stressful! Travel safe!

5 Tips to Surviving a Day Off in College

Every once and a blue moon class will get canceled for a snow or rain day and it is imperative to be ready with all the necessary equipment to tough out the storm. A day off can be filled with memories you will never forget with friends and classmates if you are correctly prepared! These are some tips to help you make the best of an unexpected day off:

1. Stock up on food a few days before you know a storm is going to hit

It is really important to have a solid food stock in your pantry in case you get snowed or flooded in for a few days (plus snacks always make watching good movies better). I know you will probably only want to pick out your favorite junk food but try to throw some hearty foods in there like soup as well.

2. Make sure your Netflix queue has all your favorite classics and some new shows you have been dying to try

Now is your time to sit on the couch and do absolutely nothing without feeling guilty about it! Use that time wisely, you don’t want to be spending precious hours looking through all the possible Netflix options. Have a few shows and movies picked out and ready to watch.

3. Grab some board games

In the worst case scenario when the power goes out, make sure to have some board games or cards games around to keep yourself occupied. Plus if you go looking down the hall and ask people to join in you never know who you might meet! Board games on a snow day are a great way to make new friends and step away from all the electronics for a few hours.

4. Fully charge all electronics before the store hits

The worst part of a storm is having no cell phone to call if you need help. Make sure to charge your phone, computer, tablet and any other possible devices you might need in case the power goes out. Since no one learns phone numbers these days, a dead phone can be dangerous, so write down a few important emergency contacts on a piece of paper just in case.

5. Make the most of your day and hangout with friends

Call up all your buddies and spend the day hanging out with out the normal stresses of college. The homework can wait till tomorrow but the memories you might make on a day off can’t! Days off only happen once a year if you are lucky, so seize the moment!

To Stay Single or to Cuff, That is The Question. . .

So what is the deal with this whole cuffing season thing? Have people in this century forgotten that you are allowed to be alone? Being single and happy is not a crime, just for the record.

I am sure just about everyone in college has heard about this anonymous app Yik Yak and if you are like me, you are constantly checking it to make sure no one witnessed you eat shit on the sidewalk while on campus but lately all the posts are about relationships and this idea of a “cuffing season”.

Let me define “cuffing season” for those who might be out of touch with this youngster lingo; “cuffing season” is usually a period during the fall and winter months when people get into relationships so that they have someone to cuddle with until the world thaws out for spring and we can break out those bikini bodies and go back to being single. Basically getting cuffed is usually settling with someone for 4 or 5 months because you are too lazy to go out and put in any effort to meet new people and you blame it on the cold weather.

I’m sorry but does anyone else find this utterly ridiculous?! First of all, I go to school in the south so those “cold temperatures” are all of 40 degrees, which is not cold in case you were wondering (just put on a jacket!!). Secondly, what’s the big perk of being in a relationship and having to deal with someone else’s shit? I can barely make sure that my life is together on a daily basis and now I have to deal with another human being’s life?

It’s kind of upsetting that a lot of our college culture today is based around getting into a relationship. I mean if you go up to a group of girls on campus I promise you 80% of their conversations are about boys and reading their mixed signals. Why can’t we all just focus on the fact that we are in college getting a better education with tons of amazing opportunities from internships to meeting awesome new people in clubs? This heavy focus on not wanting to be alone must be stopped immediately!

Being single is awesome! You can do whatever you want, whenever you want (within reason of course).  You can explore the world, take naps on your own schedule and most of all you don’t have to share your food! (Yes, that dinner for two is just for me and no I will not be needing a second set of silverware.) College is about finding yourself through new friends and experiences so let’s lose the cuffing season and get back to throwing huge football parties on Monday nights with friends!

I am not saying all relationships are a waste, I just want people to stop putting such a heavy focus on them. Relationships are great and it is nice to have someone there when you need them but all this pressure to be in a relationship all the time is a lot of mental strain. Let’s put an end the age of Netflix and chill!

To learn more about the horrendous cuffing season epidemic that is plaguing our society please click the link http://www.mtv.com/news/1939186/cuffing-season-science/

An Open Letter to. . .

I want to write this open letter to the boy who broke my best friend’s heart. We all know those guys that leave our best friends’ sobbing for hours after wayy too many glasses of wine who deserved to be called out on their shit.

Dear boys who have broken my best friends’ heart,

I wish you could see her, the girl you left broken hearted on the cold bathroom tiles sobbing about why she isn’t good enough. Was your game after all this time really worth it? I understand that we are all young and “finding” ourselves but you knew what you were doing and for some sick reason you did it anyway. And now here I am, stuck picking up the broken pieces with glasses of wine and tubs of ice cream.

One day, I hope that you have a daughter. I hope that she goes off to college with crazy hopes and dreams about the boy she wants to find and fall in love with. Most of all I hope she finds a guy like you. I hope YOU get the phone call, of her crying hysterically with a broken pride, left feeling inadequate and confused about why anyone would go out of their way to hurt another human being. I hope you are stuck rebuilding her self-esteem and faith in the beauty of life. Then I hope you think back to your “crazy days”. The days where it was all a game to get girls and break hearts. You are the reason someone else’s daughter was crying for days, but it was all “just a game” back then right?

You know what you did and you know it wasn’t right. You left a gorgeous, bright and happy girl devastated to get your quick fix of attention. It is hard enough in this day and age to feel like you are enough for anyone, so why did you lead her on for so long just to shatter her? Time will pass and she will get stronger and find someone better than you, but this is your life so I hope you like it.

To the boy who broke my best friend’s heart I just ask why… I hope the karma you get back was really that worth it in the end.

Most Sincerely,
Her best friend

“The biggest coward of a man,
is to awaken the love of a woman
without the intention of loving her”
-Bob Marley